


Sea Meets Land

by hudsteith



Series: Baby, you're the one [1]
Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Happy Ending, M/M, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:29:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23131729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hudsteith/pseuds/hudsteith
Summary: In a world where you see everything in shades of gray until you see your soulmate's eyes for the first time, Roger thinks that not meeting his match would be better...but he'll meet a bassist that may change his mind.
Relationships: John Deacon/Roger Taylor
Series: Baby, you're the one [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2053551
Comments: 50
Kudos: 76





	1. Shades of Gray

**Author's Note:**

> That's my soulmate fic, because I like the theme, but I wanted to make in my own terms  
> It's fluff as fuck, which I'm not totally used to, but I tried :)

Roger hated this whole soulmate system since he was a kid. ‘One day you will see that the world is colorful and beautiful, just as you’ that’s what his mom used to said when she explained to him that he’s destined to someone. But now he was twenty-three and his soulmate wasn’t around.

He liked to believe he didn’t give a fuck about it.

How could he? His mother had been married for decades with a man that wasn’t her soulmate and she had accepted that, even though he was horrible to her and to her kids. Thanks to God (and the police) his father couldn’t be closer to them anymore. Years before, his mother found her soulmate, after almost forty years of existence, during making groceries.

Silly.

Roger only knew some things about himself because one of his aunts had already found her soulmate and said to him during a family party “You have a beautiful shade of blue eyes, Roger.”

 _What the hell did that mean?_ To Roger that meant nothing, because his life was still only shades of gray. Bit by bit he started to say ‘fuck the system’ and live his life on his own way. His soulmate would have a little of trouble finding him, because he wouldn’t let things be easy for them. After all he was on his twenties, all he could think about was the band he had with Brian and Tim and about shagging every pretty person that crossed his sight.

Love didn’t have space on his life right now. Maybe it never would.

The man heard once that wearing sunglasses blocked the effect of the first eye-contact with anyone, and he gave a try, because why not? And he even could put a sight aid on the sunglasses, so he could see better without losing his coolness.

\---

“I can’t believe it, Tim!” that was what Roger heard when he came back to his booth.

The band (called Smile) just finished a gig on the pub near Brian’s school, and Tim said he had news for Brian and Roger, and to be fair the Smile drummer innocently thought Tim’d say he found a way to make their demo. They needed to go to some place; free beer after the gig wasn’t a nice reward in the long road.

But by the tone Brian was speaking it wasn’t good news.

“Brian, be reasonable.” Sighed Tim, drinking his beer.

“He’s leaving us, Rog.” Brian barked, revolted.

Roger confused expression changed to an outrageous one. “What the hell, Tim? We’re together in this band in two years!”

“Exactly, Roger.” Tim spoke back, calmly. “Two years playing with you and Brian but not going anywhere.”

“But we will, damnit!”

“Yeah? When?”

Roger blinked, not giving a good answer to thatm but his hot head wouldn’t let Tim notice this. “Soon, you idiot. If you stay, you will see.”

“Sorry, Rog, but I can’t wait. There’s a band that wants me to play, and they already have their own place to record.”

Roger saw Brian open his mouth, signing how jealous he was, and Roger pocked his arm, to wake him up. Brian shook his head, recomposing himself.

“And you’re the main singer and the bass player. _You’re half of the band!_ ” commented Brian, whiny.

“I’m really sorry, Brian. I hope you can remain friends besides of this.” Tim scolded Brian’s back, smiling friendly.

“You can also suck my dick!” shouted Roger, making some people next to them look to their booth. But Roger didn’t care, he stormed out, going to the pub’s front door.

He could not believe this! The band was going well...Not as much as he wanted to, but they were alright. Their music was good and with time they’d go somewhere, make bigger concerts, and he could pay his bills without his mom helping him.

Or else he’d have to think on being a biologist.

It was a honourable job, he couldn’t disagree, but it was not him. He was only getting a degree to make his mother proud, but he couldn’t imagine doing other thing than playing his drums and being on a stage, entertaining a crowd. He only felt himself alive when he was doing music, and just the thought of not being in an active band and having to start over was making his stomach growl over.

He was lighting a cigarette when the pub door was opened again and Brian appeared, looking to the street and finding him. The oldest man walked to him, looking as worried as him, but (as Roger thought with himself) Brian liked his degree, and could even work with it, even though he liked to play guitar as well.

“You know we can’t blame Tim for wanting a better choice for himself.” Started Brian.

Roger snorted; of course Brian would be empathic with the bastard. “So you’re saying we aren’t a good choice?”

“They have a studio already to record, Rog! And we barely pay the gas to go to the pubs we play.”

“Whatever.” Roger inhaled the smoke again, letting the anxiety dissipate with the cigarette ashes, and when he exhaled he remembered a thing, and groaned. “Fuck, we need to make auditions for two members. I bet we can’t easily find a bassist that can sing too. Fuck you, Tim.”

Brian laughed softly. “It’ll be good for you to know people. I mean, people you won’t shag and then never see again.”

“Fuck you too, Brian.”

“Next week we can start to look for new members.”

_\---_

Brian was taking a lot of classes this year, so his time to the auditions was tighter than Roger. But, as always, he was more on time than him.

The drummer’s last date was still on his bed when he woke up, and she wanted to repeat what they did last night, Roger accepted the request after seeing her naked body again. After that, he cursed himself for being already ten minutes late to the audition. When he arrived at the auditorium he was forty minutes late. Brian gave him an epic lecture about being responsible ‘or else I will look for a new drummer too’.

To be fair Roger was a really good drummer, and Brian’s best friend since the first year of college, so he couldn’t see the guitar player getting rid of him that easily.

That reminded him when Tim asked him, in the beginning of the band, if Brian was his soulmate. Roger had laughed and replied “We wouldn’t survive a day together” and went back to his drums. Yeah, the two got along well, and even though both of them fancy men (Roger swinging on both ways), they were just good friends.

During a rehearsal Roger’s curiosity grew bigger and he looked directly on Brian’s eyes, the latter getting worried with the intensity of Roger’s glare on him. But Brian was still gray to the drummer, and then, Roger cursed himself for letting himself be affected by the stupid system.

He didn’t have the heart to say a word to Brian. The younger man knew the other believed on the soulmate system, and that he wanted so bad to find the man who’d match for life with him.

The auditions were going okay, but just okay. They couldn’t see the sparkle on the candidates’ voices they wanted to hear. That thing that made their skins shiver and their heart stop during a good song. They got a bit worried when they saw the list getting shorter and shorter.

“Maybe we could hang more posters and wait another week.” Proposed Brian, insecure.

“No, Brian. We can’t stop the gigs this long, because we’ll already use time to warm up the new members, and we didn’t find the bassist yet. So we’ll be this way for at least a month, and I bet if we wait more time everyone in London will forget about us and we won’t find gigs to play, so don’t ask me to wait any longer.”The drummer said panting.

Brian looked to his friend, clearly wanting to laugh at him. “A little over dramatic speech, but you’re right.”

The last day of auditions Roger surprisingly came to the auditorium earlier than Brian. He was thinking of ways to tease him when the door got open and he saw Brian with a big gauze on his forehead, the younger quickly got worried.

“What happened, mate?” asked Roger, walking to Brian, seeing his friend with his head a little down.

“Just a bad fall. Cut the forehead and I’m still a big highlighted, but I’m fine.” He summarised.

“Are you sure you don’t want to let this for tomorrow? They will understand.”

“I’m already here, ain’t I? So just let’s do this.” Brian’s tone was a bit strong, so Roger agreed.

“But just for precaution, look a bit up and try to focus more on your hearing. Any sign that you’re losing your senses we’ll stop and go to the hospital.” 

“Owwww, I knew you loved me!”

“Fuck off.” Jerked Roger, looking to the list of candidates. The next name intrigued him, and after some moments clarity got on his head. “I know this mate. Freddie Bulsara, I went to his store a couple of times.”

“Oh yeah? And he sings well?” questioned Brian, looking to the ceiling.

Roger rolled his eyes, hoping the dumb question was still result of the fall. “Of course I don’t know, Brian. I was there shopping. I didn’t ask him to sing.”

“Just checking.”

The door was opened again and the man they were talking walked through the auditorium. Just as the days Roger saw him, Freddie was wearing really nice clothing, enough to impress anyone around him; thinking of it, maybe this was his intention. Freddie showed a smile when he recognized Roger.

“I know you. You were in my shop a couple of weeks ago, right? Brought a nice pair of trousers.” Freddie said.

When the man stopped next to Roger he looked to the other man, which made Roger look at him too. Brian was massaging his own temples, his eyes tightly closed.

“Is he okay, darling?” asked Freddie, worried.

“Just an accident. He’s more than fine for your audition.” Roger affirmed, welcoming the candidate with a smile. “I’m Roger Taylor and he’s Brian May. If you’re ready, the stage is yours, mate.”

Freddie quickly walked to the stage, stopping in front of the other two. Roger could feel Freddie giving furtive worried looks to Brian; maybe he thought that using the worried behavior could soften Roger and Brian’s judgement, but Roger wouldn’t let himself fall on that.

When Roger thumb-ed up Freddie, the latter nodded and started to sing. Just a few words sang, and Roger was already taken. His voice was strong and yet so delicate; he could feel all the feelings Freddie wanted to express over the song, and when he highed up the notes he could sense his smile grew wider on his face.

With the corner of his eye he saw Brian opening his eyes and stop massaging his head, sitting straighter on his chair. He was also liking Freddie.

And by the way Freddie was singing, one of his hands on his chest, his eyes closed, his body relaxed; he was enjoying his singing as well. Like he was born for it. Sometimes a cheeky smile showed on his lips, maybe deeply knowing how amazing he was and how he could amaze everyone with his voice, as he was doing right now.

When he finished the song, he opened his eyes, confident, while Roger and Brian shared a look. And after Brian looked down, getting a pen to get a score to Freddie on his own list; he was that systematic.

“Freddie, we liked your performance.” Roger pointed, Brian agreeing with him with a nod, still looking down. “May I ask what song is that?” 

“Is one of my creations. I like to compose.”

“Nice. Brian and I also write our songs too. Brian more than me, I confess.”

“Fuck!” growled Brian.

His hands were on his head again, and by his expression he was in pain. Freddie went out the stage to go next to the pair, Roger already saying they must go to the hospital.

“It’s just a headache, Rog.” Brian tried to calm down his friend.

“You just fell! Maybe you need a surgery or something!” exclaimed the drummer.

“Don’t be so dramatic.”

“I have some painkillers here if he want to.” Offered Freddie, already searching for the medicine on his bag.

“Look to the ceiling, you stupid.” Demanded Roger. “That’s what happens when you look down when you can’t do this.”

Freddie, who apparently was looking for another thing on his bag, handed the painkiller to Roger, that passed to Brian, who took the pill and swallowed, humming gladly with his eyes closed. Freddie looked to the other two again with a little pot in hands.

“That’s a cream my family use to make. Helps with pain, if he wants to.” Said Freddie.

“I doubt Brian’ll believe on it.” Teased Roger. “He’s a science man, only believe in medicine and proof facts.” 

Freddie didn’t look bitter with the comment. “Can I try it, Brian?”

The curly-haired guy didn’t respond with words, only nodding, making Roger theatrically gasp in surprise. Freddie smiled and sat in a chair in front of Brian, taking a portion of the cream with his fingertips and passing on Brian’s temples, softly massaging them.

And the first response of Brian was a muffled moan. The cream had a strong scent of mint and cinnamon, but it looked good on the skin, and Freddie’s smile got bigger when Brian said “It’s really good.”

“Old family reciept.” Freddie proudly commented.

“I can’t believe I’m nearby to see Brian May using homemade medicine.” Joked the drummer.

“Fuck off.” Said Brian, but he was smiling. And he opened his eyes to look to his savior (and potential main singer). “Freddie, thank you so –”

And Roger saw an expression (that he saw on other pairs so many times that it’s almost familiar to him, even that he couldn’t relate) appear on the Brian and Freddie’s face. Their irises wided, like if they were looking to the Sun, and instead of blinking or looking away they just wanted to stare more and more.

He felt a burning when he saw Brian and Freddie smiling to each other, with acknowledgement.

“You have beautiful eyes, Freddie.” Fainted Brian.

“So have you, Brian.” Freddie blushed.


	2. Senses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting it bc I'm too anxious to wait

Roger wanted to say it was disgusting to see how happy Brian and Freddie were together, but it wasn’t. He was happy for his friend.

After Freddie’s audition Brian asked him out right away (obviously), but the man refused to go anywhere than the hospital (“You need to examinate your head, dear” was what Freddie said), and Brian couldn’t say no to his soulmate. Roger had to remind his friend he couldn’t be so excited or else he could faint.

And before he knew Freddie Bulsara was _everywhere_.

Brian always called Roger to go to his boyfriend’s shop, and Roger only accepted because it was a really good shop. And because Freddie had a really cute friend that helped him there.

Not that Freddie was unbearable, no. He was a really nice guy, with good fashion and music taste. When Roger stopped to talk with him they almost spent the whole afternoon chatting, jumping from one topic to another, letting Brian get a little jealous. 

(“You want to steal my man, Roger? Because I will fight for him.” Joked the guitarist, lifting his fists, making Roger roll his eyes.

“No need to be afraid, love. I’m only yours.” Freddie promised, planting a kiss on his cheek.)

What Roger couldn’t handle was seeing them, a pair of soulmates, so close to him.

He saw people finding their soulmates in the middle of the street, or during a party, or bumping on each other in the university halls. He saw the shining on their eyes when their world got colorful and brighter (the last part was just a Roger’s hunch), and until now he didn’t mind, because they were far away from him, so the drummer didn’t need to see all the shenanigans couple do, that would be easier to ignore.

But he couldn’t ignore Brian and Freddie.

It was like they breath together, in one go. Roger made a joke or two, but then it looked terrifying to him.

It was a feeling he could almost nominate, but it was hard for him because maybe he didn’t want to know. 

Freddie was late for the band rehearsal, which was usual (and Roger kinda wanted for Brian to break the soulmate inicial spell so he could snap on Freddie about being on time), when the tallest man was looking to Roger. The drummer was adjusting the drumkit when he caught Brian staring. “Mate, I’m flattered, but you’re not my type.” Affirmed Roger.

“No, it’s that...Your eyes are so blue.” Brian commented, genuinely admiring Roger. After Freddie and him found each other, Roger was more around them without sunglasses.

The drummer just blinked, not believing what Brian was saying. Of all people he needed to hear this, from his best friend.  
“Like, a really clear blue shade.” A pure smile showed on Brian’s lips. And there was when Roger lost it.

“And why the fuck could that matter to me? I don’t fucking know how blue is like, you fucker!”

He kicked the nearest thing around: the drum hi-hat, the object making a loud noise when it hit the ground, and Brian got scared with his friend’s behavior.

Roger walked away, waiting to be as far as he could from Brian, and he had almost reached the door, but Brian was faster and touched his shoulder, the drummer quickly shoved him off. “Let me go, man!”

“No. Because I’m your best friend and it’s kinda my job to know why you reacted like that.” Brian said, simply.

Roger sighed, beaten, and sat in a chair, Brian sitting next to him, quietly waiting for the youngest to explaining himself. 

“You know I hate this stupid system, right?” Roger began, seeing Brian nodding after. “They took from me the ability to see everything. And everyone got this dumb smile when they can see all the colours, and it annoys me.”

Brian tilted his head, interpreting what the blond man said. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I always knew you didn’t like about all this.”

“Don’t, Brian. I mean” Roger let himself smile a bit. “you found your match. You’re allowed to be corny. I’m just...frustrated.”

“Why?”

Roger bit his own lip, trying to find words that didn’t make him sound like a fool.

“I mean...How blind people can find their soulmates?”

Brian laughed for some good moments, not believing on the drummer’s mind. “I knew they discover it by the hearing. Like the sound gets more amplified after the first time they hear their soulmate.”

“And what if their soulmate isn’t blind too?”

The guitar player maintained his smile, soft. “Roger, this is not the point. I guess...Maybe the point is to understand that, with love, our senses got more intense. Like love changed something meaningful enough on our lives for us to notice.”

Brian’s words stroke Roger hard, because he never thought of it that way. Maybe that’s the best interpretation he heard about the soulmate system in his whole life. And of course the words needed to come from Brian, one of the sappiest people the drummer knew.

“Imagine that you never had seen Freddie’s eyes, for some stupid reason. Actually you almost lost your chance.” Roger insisted on his role.

“True. But we’d find each other anyway.” Brian shrugged, unbeatable.

“How you can be sure?”

“We are soulmates, Rog. I just know.”

Perhaps this answer could be enough for Brian, but not for Roger, who just snorted sarcastically and went back to his drums, to finish his work. 

One day they three were hanging out at Brian’s flat, after putting posters for bassists auditions all afternoon, and Brian went out to bring dinner for them. Letting Roger and Freddie alone.

Their friendship got better than already was after Freddie call Roger to be his business partner on his shop. Roger could help him choosing the clothing (even not knowing the colours Roger has a good eye to clothing style) and the drummer had some trousers and shirts he didn’t want anymore. The money would be good to help with the bills.

The youngest was humming content the song that was playing in the radio, when he heard Freddie speaking “So Brian said something about your sudden curiosity about soulmates.”

“He can keep his mouth shut around you, hun?” Roger looked at him, faking annoyance.

“Oh, I know how to keep his mouth shut, but you don’t want to know how.” Teased Freddie, making Roger whine ‘gross!’ to him. “But I thought you didn’t care about this crap, Roger.”

Roger rolled his eyes. This conversation could give him a big headache, because he’d dig childish thoughts he didn’t allow himself to have anymore.

But seeing the glow on Brian’s face when Freddie entered the room, or the sound of pleasure that Freddie made with the simple gesture of Brian spooning him...He kinda was wondering how it felt like.

“If you feel better, I didn’t care about the soulmate thing either.” That made Roger look up to Freddie again, shocked.

“But you look so keen, since the moment you saw Brian.” Roger was really surprised.

“Because I felt something on me, stronger than me, like a magnet, pushing me towards Brian. I can’t explain with words, but I got deeply worried about Brian in the moment I saw him. Of course I got a little carried away during the audition” Freddie smiled shylessly “but after that my eyes couldn’t tear away of him. Like a sense of protection.”

“Does he feel the same for you?” the question escaped his mouth before he could contained it.

Freddie grinned to see Roger getting more interested on the matter. “I know he does. You’ll feel that way before you see the person’s eyes.”

Roger’s cheeks got pink. No, he couldn’t let himself be part of it, he couldn’t be just one of them! “And what if...What if I don’t want to know them?”

“Just keep your sunglasses on, darling.” Freddie shrugged, careless. “But you will miss a good time. Sex with your soulmate is amazing.”

“Shut up.” And they giggled together.

\---

Freddie already knew Smile most known songs when the auditions for the bassist started. They got a good number of candidates, and at this part Roger thought it’d be nice if he could participate of the audition more actively; he was the other half of the rhythm section, so being a good bassist was just one of the requests. Being in sync with Roger was the other one.

The six firsts candidates were reasonable fine: some of them sounded good, but they weren’t the type of bassist they wanted. At this point Freddie, Brian and Roger knew they couldn’t handle a fourth big head like their own, so having an arrogant bass player wasn’t what they were looking for. With that four of them were out. The other two candidates were mediocre fine, and Roger said he couldn’t stand a mediocre member on his band.

“I even have to deal with this mediocre name.” Barked the drummer. “Smile is a shitty name, even when I was a dental school student.”

“Don’t be sad, darling, because I have a perfect name for us.” Announced Freddie, his arm crossed with Brian’s, the three men going to the next audition.

Some lad named John Deacon was the next of the list. Roger could smell something good on this name, he just couldn’t know _what_.

“Shot.” Demanded the blond man.

“Queen.” Freddie sang.

Roger’s first reaction was muffle a laugh. Freddie stopped his walking, raising an eyebrow.

“Sorry, mate, the name is good. But is a bit...suggestive.” smirked the drummer.

“I like it.” Brian commented.

“ _Of course_ you like it.”

“Queen sounds majestic, imposing and strong.” Freddie restarted, not letting Roger destroy his mood, his eyes shining in a dreamy way.

Roger couldn’t say he was wrong. The name was catchy, and it could stick if they knew how to do in this new stage of the band. He at least say he’d think about it. Brian chanted how good the new band name was right away, making Roger tease him.

Brian opened the auditorium door while the drummer put his sunglasses again, chatting with the main singer about a Freddie’s male friend he could help him out; Roger didn’t remember when was the last time he had sex.

To everyone’s surprise a young man with long hair was in the auditorium, and he turned around when he heard the door be open. He’s holding a bass and an amp, with a shy smile on his lips.

“Sorry for being early, my class finished earlier than I imagined.” His voice was thicker than anyone could imagine (by looking to the lad’s features). “For a second I imagined I was in the wrong place.”

“That’s okay, darling. For the record you’re the first one to be on time for the audition.” Pointed Freddie, waving exaggeratedly.

Roger felt a wave of warmness filling his body when the man nodded to Freddie and then put his eyes on him, his cheeks flexing during his content grin. A force – that he didn’t try to investigate where it was coming from – made him retribute the gesture, smiling back.

A flatting second passed but Roger could appreciate the light that crossed the man’s irises when he move forward to the band.

“I’m John Deacon” could the drummer be proud to say that John looked unwilling to look away from him? “but I guess you already know this. I’m here for the bassist audition.”

“Welcome, John.” Greeted Brian, friendly. “These are Freddie Mercury and Roger Taylor.”

Roger quickly waved to John, feeling a bit childish for not extending his hand. Why didn’t he just shake his damn hand? His skin looked so soft, like a really good egyptian silk.

But before he could think any further, the drummer paid attention to a thing. “Wait. ‘Freddie Mercury’?” Roger wore a confused expression.

Freddie looked very pretentious. “I’m legally changing my name. My father almost ripped off my head, but totally worthed.”

“How about we let John show his bass skills, mates?” remembered Brian.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prepare to fall in love for John (as usual)


	3. Under your touch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm too sappy over my own fic, sorry  
> I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I did while I was writing it

Roger felt the need to use his unknown powers to scare his bandmates. Maybe a threatening tone that tended to appear once in a while, or else some dirty old story he knew about Brian that he wouldn’t want to Freddie to hear about.

That’s what he would do in case Brian and Freddie wouldn’t want John Deacon on their band. Because Roger was opened to go till the last consequences to have the bassist on Queen (he was already thinking about the band with Freddie’s ridiculous name!).

John’s audition was pretty good when he was solo, the other three men watching him from the audience, and without Freddie or Brian signing for him to go to the stage, Roger sensed his legs moving, and he only could interpret that as the bass player being that good. So good that it made him want to play with him already. The long-haired man welcomed him with a enthusiastic nod, not losing the tempo while he watched Roger approaching the drumkit.

The drummer let John lead for a moment, because he was the one who came after, and then he hit three times the bass drum and started to change the rhythm, speeding up a bit, to see if John could reach him. Their silent agreement was understood by John, that gave him a crooked grin and kept wisely fingering his bass. Roger was so used with that play that he let himself watch John’s daft fingers move on the strands; he liked the man’s style, without picks, not caring about the calluses during the playing process.

Roger also noticed John’s other hand moving along the whole bass neck without second thoughts; he was not new on that, he knew now to play. And the bassist still managed to tap his foot along to the rhythm. With an excited shout Roger showed he was liking this candidat.

When the jam stopped and John let the bass rest in front of him, Roger got out his seat, and he moved to talk with John, to compliment the little things he noticed on him, but Freddie called him out to reality.

“Roger, dear, come here.” Freddie said, his voice trying to be imparcial, but the grin on his lips showing something else.

During his walk away from John, Roger was making plans. Who cared about the rest of the auditions? He already found the bassist the band needed.

Roger looked again to John, who put his full attention on unplugging his bass. “I don’t know what you think of him, but if you don’t let him in –” Roger could hear himself being a bit rude, but he did not give a damn.

“We will discuss this?” Brian cut him, incredulous. “He’s amazing. Half of the bass players he heard couldn’t even reach Roger’s part.”

“And he did it like it was nothing!” added the drummer, glad that his friend was on his side. His heart was in a race right now, even that he’s just standing still.

“You’re right, so shall we tell him the news?” Freddie shook his hands to make the other two move. “John?”

From there Roger thought that John right now, staring anxious to them and chewing his own lip, looked tiny, almost fragile. But he knew he wasn’t none of these; his energy was powerful, intoxicating. The kind of person they needed in the band – that _Roger_ needed in his band.

“If you really want be our bass player the place is yours.” Freddie smiled, clapping.

John gasped, surprised. “Are you sure?”

“Mate, you’re flawless!” Roger didn’t contain himself. It was like he wanted to refrain himself to intruding, but it was stronger than him.

“‘Flawless’ is a strong word.” Muttered Brian.

“Shut up, Brian.” Roger hissed, not really mad. Brian just laughed.

“Let’s talk about your schedule, darling.” Freddie waved him to get down.

\---

The talk, of course, was made in a pub near the university. Freddie said that he was curious to know more about the young man – he was almost twenty-one. Now, without the bass, he looked less confident, but he managed to answer all the main singer’s questions.

“Oh, a engineering student! How wonderful. You can help us with all the sound stuff in the gigs, since this isn’t Brian’s ‘type of Physics’ knowledge.’” Freddie showed a grin in the end, making Brian rolling his eyes with the teasing.

“Astrophysics is way different and you know this.” Brian just squeezed Freddie’s upper arm.

Roger was quieter than normal. He was just listening John, trying to absorb everything he could keep from him: where he was from, why he chose that degree, what type of music he liked. Everything he could take from him, and on his mind he thought all this information was crucial for making a bond; after all they must get along, since the rhythm section had to be a one-made-of-two part of the band.

But based on John’s audition the bond was already made. Musically at least.

Even though sometimes Brian demanded his attention or that Freddie asked something, Roger’s ears were craving to hear John’s voice again, and his whole body got alert when John gave another short answer and a light laugh. At that moment it was enough.

Roger was just coming back to their booth with their beers when he felt a hand on his arm.

The touch was quick, unpretentious and innocent, but Roger never felt so warm inside. It was a strange feeling; a good one, but still strange. Call him crazy, but a nostalgic smell passed close to his nostrils, and before he could identify it, it was gone. 

And then he noticed it was John using his arm to help him to get up.

“What happened, John?” questioned Roger, urgent, even though it wasn’t urgent at all.

“I need to head out. Some lectures from my classes.” By John’s tone he really didn’t want to go. And Roger didn’t want him to leave. “Brian said in two days we can have our first rehearsal together.”

The drummer looked to the beers and then to John and then to the beers. He put them in the table and said “Just letting John outside. I’ll come back in a second.” to Freddie and Brian.

John blinked confused, but Roger didn’t hear a complaint from him when they started to walked side by side out the pub, neither when Roger put a hand on John’s back when they crossed the door. The gentle heat was in that place too.

It was incredible nice.

“Can I ask a question?” John sounded undecided, and he looked to Roger again.

“Anything, John.” Roger assured, with a big smile.

They walked some steps to the corner, John still silent. Roger started to wonder if the bass player wasn’t liking his company anymore, and he was thinking what he could possibly had done to make John change with him. 

Reluctantly, he took his hand out of John’s back, and the other man’s body changed without his touch. When they reached the corner John stopped, looking around, making Roger more anxious. What was happening? Roger hated not knowing what was going on around him, specially if he had a new x on his life, a x who’s two centimeters taller than him.

“You know what? Never mind, it was stupid.” John showed a smile, different from the others he had showed that day. (Roger knew him enough to know that one was a fake? Was he an expert of John Deacon already?)

“John, hey. Don’t get shy with me.” Roger wanted to break his personal space, and so he did, and by the look John gave to him he didn’t mind. Their shoes touched each other. “We’re on Queen now. You’re a part of this family.”

John raised an eyebrow, amused. “I thought we were Smile.”

“Name changing. Get used to it.” Smirked Roger. Was that a flirting attempt?

“Ok, then. But that’s okay, it was nothing.”

Roger could sense he was hiding something, so, just to reassure him, the drummer said “When you’re ready to say it, I will answer your question, John.”

“I know you will.” John nodded. “By the way I liked your sunglasses, it suits you. See you later then?”

“In two days or less.”

John waved a shy goodbye and crossed the highway. Sometimes he looked back, just to see Roger still in the same spot, opening smile again and waving to him. The drummer only went back to the pub when he couldn’t see John anymore.

\---

Three rehearsals with John, and Roger already could say they were ready for a gig. His body was begging for a good party for them to play.

The drummer had already made sure he and John were good together, but he still needed to fit in with Freddie and Brian. But after the usual lectures from the guitar player (“Don’t mind, John, he just thinks we’ll play for the Queen of England” said Roger once, in a playful tone.) they found their pace together. Freddie was more than happy with the addition to the band, always praising John with his good bass playing. And Roger couldn’t agree more with his friend, and by John’s body language Roger could notice the man was shy with the compliments.

“I’m not used to people saying this so often.” Confessed John, during a visit on Freddie and Roger’s shop; he never was there and Brian drove him to know the place he heard so much about for his bandmates.

“Sorry, John, but you’ll have to deal with it, because Freddie and I like to praise you.” Teased Roger, behind the balcony. “Especially me.”

Smiling to John was easy, even more after Roger found the adorable teeth gap he had. Now that Roger knew a bit more about the bass player he knew how to push some buttons, and how soft the man could be after a good compliment.

Roger lost the count of how many times Freddie had to shush them because they couldn’t stop talking or giggling to each other. But it was impossible to be bland when John was around; he knew this since day one. A stupid yet strong need to ask one more question or to chat a bit more about nothing particularly relevant (even though for them it might be a big deal). If there was a person that could bring something good from Roger that person is John. 

“How about we try some clothes on you, John?” incited the Queen main singer.

“Wait, I have the best outfit for you!” claimed Roger, going to find the clothing. 

“He’s telling me since the day those clothes came here, over and over. Quite annoying actually.” Commented Freddie.

“I think it’s lovely that he thinks of me.” John defended the drummer, making Roger proudly smirk to Freddie.

Roger walked to John and handed him a black silk trousers with a coat with the same shade and a white silk shirt. Freddie showed the changing room to the youngest man and let him get in alone.

“I hope you both know I can’t afford this. I’m as broke as you two.” Said John behind the curtain.

“Don’t worry. This will be your outfit for our first gig.” Spoke Roger, confident.

“It will?” questioned Freddie, obviously not knowing about it.

“Please, Freddie.” Roger pouted. “John will be amazing in that outfit and a good first impression is what we need for Queen new era.”

Freddie thought about it a bit, but in the end he accepted.

After some moments John left the changing room, with the new clothing. Freddie smiled content with the choice, while Roger looked at the bass player up and down, awed with the vision.

As he imagined, the trousers got too tight for John – but wasn’t fashion now? – and also the white shirt, the last touch being in the black coat, making the outfit being elegant. John was combing his hair, and Roger almost dared to put down his sunglasses to see John a bit less grayer.

Roger stopped in front of John when the younger man looked up again, smiling coyly to him. The drummer took his hand and made him twirl, and Roger heard John giggling with the motion. The clothing fit John perfectly – but to be fair, what wouldn’t? 

When the bass player was face to face again with him Roger nodded, signing he liked, and just to add he said “You look very handsome, Deaky.”

“‘Deaky’?” questioned John, puzzled.

“Your nickname, because of your last name.” Roger clarified.

Roger’s hand never left John’s, their fingertips brushing each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How I could provide this amount of fluff??????


	4. Liar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep taking cares of yourselves and of your loves ones
> 
> TW: f slur

Freddie’s friend called them for a gig and Roger was more than happy to play again. He felt they were ready to play and own London with their music.

“They’re gonna love us, darlings! I can already feel it.” Assured Freddie, between Brian’s arms.

For some reason Roger noted Freddie and Brian tended to be more affectionate when it was only them three in a room. Everytime John arrived to the rehearsals and went to anyone’s flat, they broke the contact and tried to be just mates, Freddie being better at hiding it than Brian.

Right now, the couple was having a small talk in a low voice, Roger just being able to hear their giggles. Roger would like to have someone like this, with their inside jokes and intimacy, but if he said this out loud his friend could misunderstood and he’d never hear the end of it.

He didn’t want a soulmate, he just wanted the safety, something he never had on any of his relationships.

“Why do you never hold hands in front of John?” asked Roger, out of nowhere, breaking Brian and Freddie’s bubble. In by the look they gave to the blond drummer they forgot he was there; Roger was so used to it that he didn’t care anymore.

“I never noticed it.” Brian said, avoiding Roger’s eyes.

“But I did.” Roger firmly pointed. “What is wrong?”

“Nothing, dear.” Answered Freddie. “We just need to see if we can trust him.”

Roger blinked, not believing what he just heard. “Do you think John could bash you out?”

Brian giggled, amused with the idea. “Not bashing us out. But he’s a really good bass player, and we can miss him.” Freddie nodded in the end.

Now was the drummer’s time to laugh. “First of all, _I_ wouldn’t want to have a bully on my band, even if he’s an amazing player. Second of all, you don’t need to worry about it, because John isn’t like that.”

“How can you know?” questioned Freddie, suspicious. And then he got worried. “Did you tell him about us?”

“No, of course not! But I know John wouldn’t mind if you two are dating.”

“Again, how can you know?”

Roger shrugged, careless. “I just know.” Freddie and Brian looked to each other, frowning, and then looked to the drummer. “What?”

Because the couple could say anything, someone knocked the door. Imagining who it would be, Roger ran to the flat door, and he smiled fondly when he saw John standing in front of him, holding some beer bottles.

“Finally! I was dying to have a beer.” Roger smirked, greeting the younger man.

“Don’t be so excited to see me.” John rolled his eyes, teasing the drummer while he got into the flat.

“I don’t want you to be as cheeky as me.”

Just Roger suspected, when both men went to the living room, Brian and Freddie were sitting side by side, without touching each other, and they smiled when they saw John. They exchanged greetings when John put the beers in the table. 

Freddie looked confused to John. “Where’s the popcorn, Deaky?”

“What?” John seemed to not follow the front man.

“Tonight is movie night and you’re in the charge of bringing the food and drinks? How we can have a movie night without popcorn?”

John bit his own lip, guilty. “I’m sorry. I knew I was forgetting something.”

“Freddie, don’t scare the man.” Brian warned Freddie, but the lecture part was ruined when the curly-haired man showed a too-kind smile to the other. And glancing back to John, he said “There’s a shop two blocks from here, you can buy the popcorn there.”

“I’ll go with you, Deaky.” Added Roger.

\---

Roger got used to the silence when he was around John. Normally he hated silence, because he thought the person was avoiding him, but with John was different; the bass player was always thinking about something, that’s for sure, worrying about his college and the band and his family (which he didn’t see since the beginning of the semester, John said). Roger knew when he wanted to talk about those things he would. The drummer didn’t want to rush anything, he wanted John to trust him, to know that he could count on him.

And for some reason he still didn’t figure out why John’s trust was important to him. Anything about John was important.

They were in the grocery shop, looking for the popcorn, but not really in a rush to find it. They were killing time. Roger was about to make a joke about a tampons brand name when John commented “So when are Freddie and Brian going to tell me they’re dating?”

Roger blinked at the man. He was really not trying to find excuses, because there was no need to, but the oldest man thought it was good to know he was right about John.

The bass player wasn’t offended or horrified. He was curious.

“They’re worried that you’d mind.” Roger said.

“Okay. Well, I don’t.” the younger man said, with a bland smile. “And for how long have they been dating?”

“Not much. They are soulmates.”

“Oh.” John sounded a bit surprised, but not surprised enough. “So their world is complete.”

The bass player took the popcorn and walked to the cashier, letting Roger wonder what was his thought about the soulmate system.

When they left the store, Roger didn’t waste time and asked “So you’re a pro-soulmate match or not?”

John stayed quiet for a bit, and then he spoke “I don’t mind much, to be honest. I mean, if I find my soulmate, that’s great, but if I don’t, I’m fine too. I like the gray colour, to be honest.” And he smirked in the end.

“You prick.” Jested the drummer. “Brian said to me once that before he found Freddie he always felt a permanent nostalgia, and that feeling was gone after Freddie.”

“I like nostalgia. It helps us to feel things. Maybe he was missing Freddie before he even met him.”

“Maybe.”

They took some steps in silence, and Roger started to feel he was close to something he’d never felt before, and he couldn’t put a name on it, but it was something very valuable. His hands were itching, and the older man wanted to tell John about it, but maybe the other would think he’s crazy.

“What about you? Have you found your soulmate yet?” asked John.

“No. Still a gray world.” Shrugged Roger, looking at him.

“Do you want to find them?”

“No.” Roger looked to the ground, hoping that John didn’t notice anything on his tone.

“You’re such a liar!” laughed John.

Roger bit his own lip. How could the man say something like that to Roger and he didn’t jump on anger? Normally he would go mad at Brian with the slightest of jokes, and with Freddie’s teasings, but with John he couldn’t.

Maybe because John was right. Maybe because John wouldn’t judge him. Or maybe because John had some _power_ over him.

“I’m not lying!” proclaimed Roger, just to humour the other. “Why do you think I wear sunglasses all the time? Because I don’t want to be like Brian or Freddie or anyone else I know who’s already taken.”

John turned around, stopping in front of the drummer, making Roger stop too. The younger man was touching his index finger on his jawline, letting the finger slide until the chin. Roger observed the scene without blinking, just wondering how someone could be so expressive doing such a stupid motion.

“No, I don’t buy this. I think you’re just afraid to find love and be bored of it, or maybe you think you don’t deserve love.” The bass player spitted, like it was nothing.

Yeah, it was hurtful to hear what he knew about himself since forever. Maybe the issue was more scary for him after he had spent all this time with his best friend and his boyfriend. Roger saw what he was missing, what he had been running away from so strongly to not have. But in the end it seemed stupid to not want to.

When he saw his mother with his stepfather, like they were always in a honeymoon he believed there was someone out there for him. But in the same moment he remembered how long it took to his mom to find him, and how much she had suffered before him. If the system was fair, his mother should had met the love of her life sooner.

Being in love sounded amazing, but he didn’t know what to do if this person went away from your life. A childish fear of being abandoned (like his father did to him) still kick in his stomach every time he saw a person who wanted to make a bigger step with him. Roger had never had a second date.

It sounded stupid, but he wanted so bad to be loved that he’d rather not know how it was to be in love at all. 

“You’re a really good observant.” Commented Roger, trying to look chill. It was not John’s fault that he had issues to work on.

“Roger” John landed his hands on Roger’s shoulders, caressing them. “You don’t need to be afraid of letting people get into your life. They can be awful, but they can also be great. You can have a good person in your life, even if your world is still gray. But only if you let them to.”

John’s hands squeezed Roger’s shoulders before he ran up his body. The drummer could feel the sense of peace while John’s skin was on him, and he liked to feel the bassist’s fingers touching his neck. John smiled a bit when he cupped Roger’s cheeks before he caressed them with his thumbs. The drummer had been touched before, but something was different this time; it had a meaning, a sentiment on this simples and innocent movement.

His hands ended up on Roger’s sunglasses. He wiggled a couple of times to sign what he wanted to do, and if Roger consented it. The oldest man slightly nodded, and John started to slowly take off his glasses.

“Faggots!” They heard behind them.

Roger put on his sunglasses again, to see clearly, and behind them, at the end of the other block, three men were looking at them, and they looked disgusted with what they were seeing. And they started to run to them.

In another moment, Roger would have standed up and fight, but John was with him, and he wouldn’t dare to put John on danger. So he just took John’s hand and started to run, John doing the same.

Luckily Brian’s building was right in the corner, so they had an advance on the men, and with time they got in the building and locked the door up. Roger and John still ran a bit until the stairs, the adrenaline still high on their bodies.

“Thank God we’re close.” John was the first to speak, still catching some air.

“Yeah. Sorry about that.” Roger was holding on his knees, trying to recompose himself. “These jerks are stupid.”

“That’s fine.” The bass player was breathing better now, almost normally. “I’m flattered they thought I could catch someone like you.”

Roger saw John giggling softly, and he couldn’t hold a laugh either. “Only you could say something like that. But you’re not bad, Deaky. You’re not bad at all.”

John bit his own lip, and before Roger could have second thoughts he said “Let’s go upstairs?”

“Ok.”


	5. Almost everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't write the end, bc it's hard to me to end a fic  
> I really like tjis one, and everything it makes me feel  
> It's good to know that I can do fluff lol

Their first gig as Queen (and with Freddie and John) was very good. The crowd was really responsive to them and in the end they wanted more. The band was complimented by a lot of people and even the owner of the pub said they could play there again anytime soon.

“This deserves a celebration!” exclaimed Freddie, very full of himself. He signed four beers to the bartender. “The first round is on me.”

“Just the first one?” pushed Roger.

“We’re poor, Roger. Not yet.”

“I like seeing that you’re believing on this.” Commented Brian, happy. The beers came quickly, Roger being the first to take a bottle.

“Of course we are!” shouted the drummer. “Fuck you, Tim!”

The other three laughed but replied the same, cheering between them.

After three rounds Freddie pulled Brian, even with protests, to go to the dance floor. John and Roger laughed seeing Freddie dancing with grace while Brian just swinged next to the front man. But in the end the guitarist showed a soft smile, that was reserved just for his soulmate.

“That’s the kind of stuff you do for your soulmate?” asked John, still giggling.

“How should I know?” asked back Roger, but he sounded amused.

John took a couple of sips of his beer and started again “So Brian said to me you’re very...into parties. But here are you, without a bird around your arms.”

The drummer looked at him. The younger man looked a bit out, maybe he was weak for the drinking, but he smiled either way. “Yeah, I’m not into that tonight. Just rather talk with you.”

With this John breathed a “Ow, that’s sweet.” and rested his head on Roger’s shoulder. He shut his eyes and envolved one of the drummer’s arm with his own. The other knew he was drunk, and he’d be asleep in any minute, but he was a bit selfish to let the contact rest a little longer.

“But that woman was looking at you since the gig.” Whispered John.

Roger was aware of the woman. He was always aware of people who were looking at him with desire. It was good to his pride know he was wanted.

“But I don’t want her.” Roger said, and through his lenses he saw John looking back to him.

“And who you want?”

His head froze. John’s voice was soft, so full of curiosity, and with a hint of an unknown feeling Roger’s stomach rolled over.

He was so fucking close…

“Let’s get out of here. You need to sleep.” Said Roger, already getting up of the booth.

“What about Freddie and Brian?” John asked, getting up too.

“They can take care of themselves.”

Roger was holding John, who was a bit sleepy already, until he found his car. Right now he needed to put John in a bed, so he could sleep. 

During the way to John’s flat, Roger felt John leaning his head on his shoulder, humming during the motion, feeling himself at home, and the drummer couldn’t hide the smirk. The younger man had an effect on him, even more when they touched each other. When he stopped in a red light, Roger watched John squeezing his cheek on him, making himself more comfortable, and he didn’t refrain himself from kissing John’s forehead.

A grateful sound came out of the bassist’s throat with the affectionate gesture.

Maybe Roger didn’t want the contact to end, because he was driving slower than usual, and he sighed bitterly when he saw John’s building. But he needed to care about John’s comfort first, so when he parked in front of his flat, Roger whispered close to the other’s face “John?”

He didn’t respond, but he saw a slight frown on John’s eyebrows. He noticed the man was faking the deep sleep. “Deaky, come on. You need to sleep, in a proper bed.”

“I’m good here.” John’s voice came so smooth that melted Roger’s heart.

“I’m glad you find my shoulder comfy, but I’m sure your bed is more.”

“How you can be sure?”

Roger swollen the answer. It looked like drunk John was flirty. 

“Let’s go to your flat. Drink some water and go to bed.”

“Uh, so you’re coming?”

With that Roger managed to take John out of the car. Now he looked more dizzy, and until they reached the building front door the bass player took a couple of deep breaths, letting Roger worried.

“Are you okay, John?” asked Roger, still on his side.

“I’ve been better.” John showed a weak smile.

Roger noticed how worried he got with small things John felt around him. Even when he complained about a headache Roger was there to help him to take care of it. An unique sense of protection, that in other times would make Roger worried but right now just seemed natural.

They climbed the stairs, John trying to not be so loud, but he stumbled over some steps sometimes, laughing of himself. The drummer thought it’d be better if he was behind him, in case John fell at some point.

“You’re a danger.” Giggled Roger. “Keys?”

“But a cute danger?” John handed his keys to Roger, letting the other passed forward to unlock his flat door.

Roger opened the flat door, letting John pass first, and closing the door after. “A very cute one.”

When the oldest man turned around to see John he didn’t had much time, because he just felt being smashed against the flat door, his back making a sound with the hit.

Before he could ask what was going on, the drummer felt a hand tugging at his hair softly, pushing it with pressure enough to making him shiver. A moan was on his throat when an open mouth started to give him wet and warm kisses on his Adam apple.

The other hand took off Roger’s glasses, and he closed his eyes, letting his whole body drown on the pleasure.

“Please, ask me to stop, or else I won’t.” John said between kisses, and a small bite on the side of Roger’s neck.

Fuck, every cell of Roger’s skin was on fire, on ecstasy with the bass player’s mouth on him, and he was thinking Roger didn’t want any of that? To be honest it was like every step they made around each other was built to lead them to this.

“Kiss me, Deaky.” there was an excitement on Roger that he hadn’t felt ever. Not even before his first kiss or before his first time.

John let his lips travel from Roger’s neck all the way to his lips. It was slow but also quick, in a perfect timing. The drummer, who was always anxious, accepted every millisecond of that moment, letting himself enjoy the touch between their skins, gasping when a caring kiss was given on his earlobe.

He still felt their lower lips touching for a flatting moment.

And then John’s hands let out his body just as himself. When Roger opened his eyes he could only see John running to his bedroom. Instinctively, Roger ran behind him, and when he reached the room he heard John locking himself in the bathroom, and heard the door getting locked. In vain, he tried to open up, but it was locked indeed.

Roger got more worried when he heard a sound of someone vomiting.

He banged the door, terrified. “John, are you okay?” No response, but more sounds of food being expelled. “Please, say something. Let me in, Deaky. Let me help you.”

“No. I don’t want you to see this.” John’s voice was raw, maybe because of the effort of throwing up. 

“Please, John, I don’t care about the smell or anything. Just let me help.” Roger was feeling powerless behind that door, without helping the bassist. Each second passing, the more worried he’s getting.

“Just wait there. I’m getting out soon.” 

“Okay, but if you’re not coming in five minutes I’ll break down this door.” 

He heard a low giggle from John, which was a good sign for him, so he let the man have some space.

Roger went to the kitchen, to grab a glass of water and some aspirin for the youngest man; he knew by experience that eating something right after throwing up could make it worse than better. So, with the medicine, he came back to the bedroom.

Roger never got into John’s bedroom; he had hanged out at the bassist’s flat a couple of times, but he had never looked inside this room. As a college student, John had some books on his study table, mostly Physics stuff that Roger never understood very well, and he saw some notes made by John about his own homework, the drummer smirking with the tiny and classy handwriting of the Engineering student.

Looking around, Roger also saw some posters of bands John liked. Since the beginning he had mentioned he liked more R&B and soul music, something lighter than Roger’s taste, but that fit with the bass player’s personality. The man remembered that he had already heard John talking a whole afternoon about a swiss band he discovered some months ago, and how addicted he was to their music. Roger heard him speak with a smile on his face, not caring about how he was absolutely sure that he wouldn’t like their songs, but enjoying the enthusiasm and energy on John’s tone, and for him that was what really mattered.

On his nightstand there were some books John liked to read before sleep. Roger was more of a sci-fi novels kind of guy, but John liked suspense and thrillers, getting really excited with their books. Once the band was at Freddie’s flat and John was reading a book without blinking while the other three were playing Scrabble. Even the yelling and fighting weren’t enough to make him look away from the pages, and Roger even pouted, joking how that book would replace him for John.

And close to the closet, John’s bass was standing in the wall. For so many times Roger recalled how was John’s audition, just to feel again that strange yet good feeling that was seeing John fingering that bass for the first time. That instrument was what made they meet, and Roger thought how would it had been if John really sticked with the guitar instead of switching to the bass, as he had mentioned before. The thought passed some times on the drummer’s head, and to be honest, for him it would be horrifying not having John on his life.

All small objects on that room told him something about the youngest’s man’s life, little somethings that he’d die to know more about. Because it didn’t matter if it wasn’t important for him, or even if he’d never use that information on his life, but if it was for John he wanted to know. He couldn’t describe why it’s a big deal, Roger just wanted to show that he cared about him.

His attention went up when the bathroom door was unlocked, and he looked expectantly.

“Do you mind to turn off the light? I’m a bit sensitive right now.” John sounded shy with the request. Of course, thought Roger, since he had always care about not disturbing anyone, even on his own house.

“Of course. Just a moment.” Roger closed the bedroom door, and then the window curtains (to not let any light from the outside get in the bedroom). 

Now the room was completely dark. The only light Roger could see was the bathroom light, so he based with that to sit in the bed, choosing the right side because he knew John would go to the left side (how he knew he would, that he didn’t know).

“Lights off, Deaky.” Posted Roger.

The bathroom light was turned off too and Roger heard the door being opened. He could feel the movement in the corner of the room, and the oldest man could only see a silhouette of the other one walking to the bed. Only now Roger questioned himself if it’d be appropriated to sleep there. He wanted to take care of John, but he didn’t want to pressure him.

When he felt the other side of the bed getting down, Roger said “There’s a glass of water and aspirin in the nightstand for you.”

“Thanks.” John said, and he heard the cup crashing softly with his hand and seconds after the sound of him drinking the water. After he rested the empty glass again in the nightstand.

“How are you now?”

“Better. I shouldn’t have drunk that much.”

“That’s fine. We were celebrating, after all.” 

Roger heard John taking off a piece of clothing, and by the silhouette he noticed it was the shirt. His mouth got watered, even though right now he just wanted to hold John on his arms, spooning him during the night and making sure he wouldn’t feel sick anymore.

“Can you stay, Rog?” John asked before he gave a loud yawn, and Roger noted that he laid down. Mirroring him, he did the same. Even though they were only inches apart, they couldn’t see each other. “As much as I want to give you the make-out I promised you before, I’m really tired. Sorry.”

“That’s fine. Maybe tomorrow morning?” Roger teased, receiving a slap in the shoulder.

“Deal.”

Roger took off his shirt too to get more comfortable. He didn’t even think about it before he felt himself leaning towards John. His hand found the bassist’s waist and he pulled him in close, holding tight. He couldn’t be less worried of being too forward, and in a second John’s hand was above his, connecting them. There was a need of the whole body be glued with the youngest’s man’s, so he intertwined their legs, their feet playing a bit, squeezing on each other.

It was so intime, so personal, that Roger found peace in that moment, and he kissed John’s neck to thank him. 

“Good night, John.” He could feel on his own voice how traped and doomed he was. 

John only hummed to him, almost asleep.


	6. Your eyes on mine

Roger hadn’t slept that well in years. It was comforting and warm and when he woke up, he hummed lazily when he realized he wasn’t alone in the bed.

He blinked a few times until he saw long hair next to his face. The drummer got confused for few seconds until he remembered last night. A tiny smile showed on his face, because he was at a good place.

And with a giggle, he remembered how he’d always hated to cuddle in bed, but with John it was only simple and logical for him.

  
Moving John’s hair away from his neck, Roger gave sweet kisses on his skin, and after some moments he saw the other man moving in his sleep. Was he being too annoying? Because Roger reckoned John’s promise last night, and he kinda wanted the kisses right now.

  
“I’m sleeping.” John’s waking-up voice was raw.

  
“You’re always lying to me, Deaks. It’s such an ugly habit.” Roger joked, now just brushing his lips on the bass player’s curve between the neck and shoulder.

  
Roger put his hand on John’s waist and made the other move around, the youngest man helping with his movements to be completely in front of Roger. He was yawning softly, his eyes closed, and Roger took this advance to shift closely, his body now glued at John’s. 

  
The natural scent of the bassist was getting Roger drunk, and if he could, the man would smell the other for the rest of the day. He was addicted already, his whole skin pulsing to do anything, mesmerized with the simple existence of John Deacon, which was absolutely ridiculous. Roger had never felt the need so pulsing before, nor even during sex. 

  
And now he just wanted to feel John, in the most innocent of the ways. Roger wanted to hold him and never let him go.

  
When John opened his eyes, Roger was leaning into him, his eyes shut, with a silly smile on his lips, and he moved his face some times, his nose brushing on John’s. The latter giggled with the action. “Morning breath.” 

“I don’t mind.” Whispered the drummer.

  
Roger cut the gap between them, finally kissing John’s lips.

  
It was a transcendent feeling, crossing Roger’s flesh that was connected with John’s until the tips of this toes. A force biggest than anything he’d ever sensed, like if he stopped it right now he could drown and die, and even with his eyes closed he could see in countless angles John’s reflection, the shape of his lips and every inch of his skin. 

  
And the oldest man moved, just to feel all over again, waves of shivers way more strong than a post-orgasm. He thought, for a quick second, that he already knew how to move on this dance, how to touch and how to be in sync. Not because he had experience, but because it was John, and somehow he knew how to do everything with him.

  
Apparently John felt the same, because every grab and squeeze made Roger float in the air, and when the youngest hummed content Roger sensed he was finally touching the sky. The feeling appeared again, now ten times higher, when John’s tongue rubbed on his, like he was used to it. Like it was home.

  
The kiss lasted less than ten seconds, but Roger was breathless, amazed, heart-full.

  
His hand reached John’s cheek, and he caressed it with tender, enjoying the smile that he made in the end of the kiss.

  
“Christ, what was that?” Roger was so far gone to complain about everything on his life. Peace was the only thing he could sense now.

  
He pulled away to smile back to John, and he opened his eyes.

  
At the same time as John.

  
Roger could feel his irises expanded in a hurtless way, but he wasn’t scared. No bad feeling could cross him right now, and warm ocean invade his being, first at his hair strands, then his head and neck, branching out at his shoulders and chest, going down at the arms, fingers and belly, in the end reaching his waist and legs. His toes curled when the warmness found them.

  
The world, in a slow wave, started to change its colour palette, and somehow he knew what was yellow and what was pink. He could distinguish the dark brown of John’s hair and the pale colour of the bass player’s neck. The slightly red on his lips from the a bit stronger red on his cheeks.

  
There was an interesting mix of gray and green on John’s iris. That probably will be Roger’s favorite colour.

  
The drummer detected John felt the same too, and the brunet looked at him with a loving smile. Now everything made sense: all the overwhelming feelings he’d felt since the moment he lied his eyes on John, his senses getting higher than usual, the homesickness when the bass player wasn’t around. Roger finally found his place.

  
He didn’t want to find it, but either way it came to him. And he was happy that it did.

  
“It’s you.” Roger breathed, his fingertips sliding on John’s face, vaulted.

  
“Thank God it’s me, or else I’d be bumped to never kiss you again.” John let his teeth popped up on his smile.

  
Roger moved again, pecking John’s lips multiple times. He kept doing it until John started to laugh. Jesus, even his laugh just made the blond feel more graceful.

  
That’s how a matched person felt like then! Why had he run away from this?

  
With the last kiss, Roger lingered more, making himself clear when he opened his mouth. John founded his lips on the oldest man’s. Roger cupped John’s face with a fervent need, moving in a sensual pace, knowing how much the bass player would like it. In fact he liked it because he whimpered during the kiss, making Roger proud.

  
The blond’s hand grabbed John’s leg just to push him closer and wrap it around Roger’s waist. 

That was the moment John pulled away.

  
“What happened?” Roger asked, confused.

  
John gave him a unbelieving smile. “You know what.”

  
Of course Roger knew. Damned soulmate hypersenses. “Deaky, I know you want a proper date and such, and I promise I will give as many dates as you want.” And Roger glued more their bodies, hips brushing on hips, and he bit his own lower lip. “But we can...I mean, Freddie said sex with your soulmate is amazing.”

  
John shook his head, laughing softly. “I bet it is. But I want the real deal. A proper date, with flirting and all. I can’t tell my kids I had sex right away just because I found my soulmate.”

  
“Kids, hun?” Roger got excited with the idea. “How many?”

  
“Too many.”

  
“And how many dates?”

  
“At least three.”

  
“Fine.” Grinned the blond man. “Just because I know you’ll have sex with me in the end.” And this made John laugh again.

  
Roger touched John’s forehead with his and closed his eyes. He breathed, calmly, satisfacted. 

That was home. John was his home.

  
“I should have reached out to you earlier. I wasted too much time without you.” Spoke the drummer, feeling guilt.

  
“Hey.” John called him, and Roger his eyes again. John was right there, with a calm expression, that instantly could getting inside the other’s veins. “It’s okay. We have the rest of our lives.”

  
And he hugged the blond, the warmness irradiating on their pores. It was like the final fit, the perfect symmetry.

  
“Maybe this is not the best moment to say that I knew all along, then.” John said, his voice trembling with humour.

  
“You what?” Roger looked at him, outrageous.

  
John liked the mocking, and he glanced Roger, trying to mutely apologizing. “Well, my mom talked me about the feelings that you feel when your soulmate is around. Some people didn’t catch that, but I kinda liked to imagine the moment I’d meet you, so...I felt that since day one, hence, you were my soulmate.”   
Roger wasn’t seriously angry – how could he, with that cute brunet caressing his hair with so much passion? – but he was surprised that he had held this secret until now.

  
“Then why didn’t you make any move?” asked Roger, curious.

  
“I couldn’t speed up the pace, you know. It’s cheesy as fuck, but just being around you was enough for me.” John kissed him, a flavour on his lips that would never bore Roger.

  
Roger enjoyed every second, hummed in the end.

  
“I’m glad it’s you, John. It worths to be forever with you.” Roger could feel he’s melting inside out, but it didn’t matter anymore.

  
\- 

  
Freddie and Brian got really happy when they heard the news, and the main singer said he was happy enough to see Roger settling down, even though their fans wouldn’t enjoy much.

  
“Specially the birds.” Joked Freddie. “God bless them.”

  
Roger didn’t mind the be teased by his friend. Every day since he’d matched it was heaven on Earth.

  
The four of them were at the clothing shop, Freddie was chanting about new clothes that had just arrived, and he was making John help him to put them in the clothes rack. Freddie was singing at the top of his lungs, and John looked at the other two, giggling with his friend’s euphoria.

  
“Are you happy?” asked Brian, out of nowhere.

  
“What?” Roger was admiring his boyfriend, he didn’t hear the guitar player.

  
“Are you happy that you found him? I mean, you can try to go away, fight the system still.”

  
Roger laughed. Yeah, his past self could try to run away for this feeling, to make himself miserable just because he was too afraid of this mysterious and unknown adventure. That sounded a lot like the rebel Roger had always tried to show off for his friend.

  
He looked again at John, and the brunet looked at him, smiling and waving to him, the blond blowing him a kiss. Maybe that was the reason John didn’t say right away, because he sensed Roger could go away and vanish. Yeah, he had matched with a really smart man, and with that Roger smirked alone.

  
“I’m happy, Brian.” Roger said, in the end. “I want this, and I think now I’m mature enough to not fight it back, it’s too much waste of energy.”

  
“I’m glad to hear that, mate.” Smiled Brian. “I just feel bad for Deaky, because he’ll have to deal with you for the rest of his live.”

  
“Fuck you.” but Roger was laughing.

  
Brian walked next to Freddie when John did the inverse way, sitting next to Roger.

  
The drummer imagined that having a soulmate meant, in fact, being glued with them as much as possible, but he didn’t felt the need. Yes, kissing and having sex with John were the best things he could have in his mortal life. But the little touches and just the sound of his voice could provide what he needed. 

  
When John grabbed his hand and squeezed he felt loved enough.

  
“Hey there.” John smiled fondly, kissing his cheek. 

  
Roger really wanted to look at John’s eyes and say how much he felt blessed to have him, that he never was so happy in his life, and that he could never asked for anything else for him, and that he would do everything that’s on his power to make John feel ten percent how he was feeling.

  
“Rog.” Called John, in a smooth voice. “I know.”

  
Damned soulmate thing. Roger only could smile back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter will be John's POV of their first meeting, just because he mentioned here :)


	7. As it began

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John knew all along. Let's see how was it for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt a bit willing to write a smut, but also I feel so much pressure to write a smut on a soulmate fic  
> It needed to be transcending and I didn't know if I couls provide it

**John’s POV**

John was a bit nervous with the whole audition thing. He had missed being in a band, playing with some folks and being on a real stage, but being a shy lad made the music craving so contradictory. Despite that, he was already at the auditorium, he wouldn’t run away from that. 

He looked to the stage, imagining that in some minutes he’s going perform there for three strangers.

Despite the nervousness, John was feeling that something good was arriving; he didn’t know what and when, but the feeling that something was coming back was on his guts, and he thought it was a funny sensation. 

He heard the door being opened and John turned around, thinking it’d be polite to great them. 

His smile showed small and shy, the brunet holding his bass and amp with more strength that he needed to.

“Sorry for being early, my class finished earlier than I’d imagined.” Said, trying to pretend he was not nervous. “For a second I imagined I was in the wrong place.”

“That’s okay, darling. For the record you’re the first one to be on time for the audition.” Pointed a man with wavy dark hair, in a cheerful tone.

John nodded to him and looked to the man next to him. He had a soft blond hair and delicate features. He was too smooth for the eye, and he’s wearing sunglasses (a weird option for a closed room, but he pulled off just fine). 

A tickling, almost a shiver, ran over John’s neck, making him feel lighter than before. It was incredible pleasant to look at that man. But he was there for an audition, he had to remember himself.

“I’m John Deacon” reluctantly, John looked away from the blond. “but I guess you already know this. I’m here for the bassist audition.”

“Welcome, John.” Greeted the curly-haired man. “That’s Freddie Mercury and Roger Taylor.”

Roger. A name for a very beautiful face. John wanted to laugh when he saw the man waving to him. For some reason he knew he wasn’t acting like himself. Maybe because John was always good to read people, but he thought Roger was being shyer than he actually was, and a pride roared at John’s chest.

“Wait. ‘Freddie Mercury’?” Roger’s voice was higher than John had imagined, but he liked either way. The blond man was confused with something

Freddie smiled proudly. “I’m legally changing my name. My father almost ripped off my head, but totally worth it.”

“How about we let John show us his bass skills, mates?” Brian spoke, trying to having their bandmates’ attention.

John walked to the stage and quickly plugged his bass and tuned it. He breathed heavily a couple of times and turned around, to be in front of the men.

He looked down to his bass and started his session, feeling calmer when he got into his own world. He imagined himself at his childhood room, jamming alone, and he let himself get dragged to that feeling. And then he heard some steps at the auditorium.

When John looked up he saw Roger approaching the stage, getting close to the drum kit that was already there. Discovering Roger was the drummer made him relaxed; they would be a team, a pair. This stupid analogy made John’s heart grew bigger and he nodded with enthusiasm when Roger sat at the drumkit.

They kept playing together, John enjoying his company in the stage, and the bass player heard Roger warning him, and he turned around. John felt a smirk growing on his lips when he understood the challenge, Roger changing the rhythm just for John reach it. He liked how the drummer was doing it. He took flatting seconds to admire Roger playing the drums: there was a raw joy in doing it, natural moves, like he was born to be a drummer.

The thought of playing more times with Roger (and Freddie and Brian, of course) crossed John’s mind, and he was more than glad to do it. John liked the idea of having Roger’s attention during the rehearsals and gigs, they two mutely communicating by music, and he’d love to get every moment he could from the drummer.

John finished his solo, and he saw Roger standing up and moving close to him, but before he could say something Freddie called him. The man oddly felt he wanted to have Roger physically around. John had never been a fan of contact, but right now he could only wonder if Roger’s skin was as soft as it seemed like.

And his nervousness got back, because he saw the three man talking in low voices, discussing his future. The engineering student just wanted to be in a band, more then ever after meeting its drummer.

“John?” Freddie’s voice made John land in reality again. “If you really want be our bass player the place is yours.” Freddie smiled, clapping.

John sounded surprised, truly happy with it. “Are you sure?”

“Mate, you’re flawless!” this exclamation coming from Roger made his heart glow, and John somehow knew the man was being sincere. The certainty of it made John feel something funny on his stomach. Brian spoke something that John didn’t catch and Roger snapped “Shut up, Brian.” and John saw Brian laughing with it.

“Let’s talk about your schedule, darling.” Freddie waved him to get down.

\---

Now this was the light talk about John. He’d never liked to talk about himself, but it was nice to see that the three men looked genuinely interested in him. John tried to not look too much to Roger’s direction, but it was impossible. He felt magnetized towards the drummer. The man was still gray to him, but he knew Roger was sickeningly charming.

Freddie seemed amazed with John's college major. “Oh, a engineering student! How wonderful. You can help us with all the sound stuff in the gigs, since this isn’t Brian’s ‘type of Physics’ knowledge.’” Freddie smirked, and looked to Brian. John thought that maybe was an inside joke.

“Astrophysics is way different and you know this.” The bass player saw Brian touching Freddie’s arm in a gentle way, but he didn’t say anything.

John kept talking with the men, trying to know more about them too. Brian was an astrophysicist – he’d need to look it up to know what that meant – and a Math teacher, Freddie was a Design student that owned a shop with Roger, and the latter was a biologist. 

He could feel Roger quiet, for some reason. John imagined that, after the little jam session together he would be more open with him. Actually he could see Roger moving every time he did anything, like talking or drinking his beer. And John could see himself change when Roger was closer or more away from him, even though they were in the same booth. Quite stranger, almost like…

_“It’s like an invisible line that connect both of you.” Explained his mother, when the boy, around 12 years old, wanted to know about the soulmate system. “You can feel it, always, but when you are closer to your soulmate, the feeling is more intense. You can almost touch it.”_

_“What about if, for some reason, I can’t see their eyes, mommy?” asked John._

_“You will know, even though you don’t realize right away.” John saw his mom’s eyes get a bit watery. She was thinking about his dad. “Love is simple, Johnny.”_

Roger just said he’d get more beers, and John saw him walking. The strange feeling was still strong.

He felt a sad cloud around his being since ever, but for the first time he felt the sun, irradiating his life.

When Roger got back, he touched the drummer’s arm. It was good, something John had never imagined to crave, but he wanted to feel it again. And then he got up.

“What happened, John?” The bass player felt splendid to hear a note of worry on the drummer’s voice.

“I need to head out. Some lectures from my classes.” John didn’t have to leave right away, but his brain needed some time to process the news. Something was telling him it’s the best. 

“Brian said in two days we can have our first rehearsal together.”

“Just letting John outside. I’ll come back in a second.” Roger put the beers on the booth and guided John to the pub door.

The warmness again. That one John now knew only Roger could provide.

“Can I ask a question?” John asked, even not knowing if he already should.

“Anything, John.” Roger gave him a big smile. John imagined that’s why his mother was always still in love with his father, after him being dead for 10 years.

Too good to vanish, too big to run away from this.

That’s when John remembered. Roger was wearing his sunglasses all the time. Maybe he was one of those people that didn’t want to find their soulmates. Maybe he wasn’t ready to know that his love was right there, next to him. John’s body got cold with the thought of being around Roger the rest of his life and not being able to see his eyes.

He didn’t mind his gray world until today.

“You know what? Never mind, it was stupid.” John tried to not show his sadness and smiled, turning around to see Roger.

“John, hey. Don’t get shy with me.” Roger sounded calm, recomforting. John was boosted, and to be honest he liked to know that Roger could sense his lie. And John felt the energy rising between them when Roger got dangerously close. “We’re on Queen now. You’re a part of this family.”

“I thought we were Smile.” Teased John.

“Name changing. Get used to it.” Smirked Roger.

Fuck, it felt good to dance around with the drummer’s voice. Now he wa more than sure: Roger was his soulmate. John finally felt safe. 

Now another thing dropped on John’s mind: Roger _could_ be one of those people, but he didn’t necessarily _had to be_ forever. He just needed time. John knew for sure Roger was feeling everything he was feeling too. It was a two-way street, the energy was flowing on both ways. 

One day Roger would understand just like him.

Not today, but someday.

“Ok, then. But that’s okay, it was nothing.”

“When you’re ready to say it, I will answer your question, John.”

“I know you will.” John nodded,. “By the way I liked your sunglasses, it suits you. See you later then?”

“In two days or less.”

John waved a shy goodbye and crossed the highway. He needed to use all his willpower to not shout that they were soulmates – he was a fucking Leo, he needed that man on his arms as soon as possible –, but it was the right decision. They would find each other, eventually, and this made John smile fondly. He had found him. 

Sometimes he looked back, just to see Roger still in the same spot, opening smile again and waving at him. His heart speeded up, with the softness. John knew he’d have to struggle days, weeks, probably months, until the drummer came around and look at him, but he knew it would be worth the wait.

_He had found him._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned  
> More fics to come  
> Bye for now


End file.
